the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
