I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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