you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
