you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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