I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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