Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
