She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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