ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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