Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
