i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
