my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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