His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
