oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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