Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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