I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
BRING THE BAGELS
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
