she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
