I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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