i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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