she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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