I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
