So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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