Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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