Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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