Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
