Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
