Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
