before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
