Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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