I molested 6 butterflies tonight
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
