Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
