I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
