I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize