Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Randomize
