Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
