Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize