i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Sorry about my life...
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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