Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
