508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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