tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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