i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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