it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize