god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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