So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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