Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
