when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
