GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
