who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
vagina is talking i cant
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
