We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
