So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
