the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
