He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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