I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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